I think that was nice story that at the end though it had the boys' attention, the flower's "riwayat hidup" came to it's end & spread new life as part of circle of life...Hahaha i guess you found your passion for story-writing......Keep up & all the best!!
This was very good. I loved the allegory of this story -- how it feels to love somebody who can never love you back. Someone who doesn't even know you exist. Making the subject of this unrequited love be a Dandelion was genius. Very nicely done, ShinLoo!
Some portions of your grammar could use tightening up, but overall the story was powerful, and your narrative voice lyrical. The emotional resonance of your prose stayed with me long after I finished reading the piece.
I clicked on the link, but for some reason I can't seem to post comments there. I'll keep trying and cast my vote for you.
david: thanks =) well u have to join the group then only can post comment. or have to email info@thecolorsmagazine.com to vote. but you don't have to go through the trouble. enough to know that you like my story. ;)
Hey i agree with David's review - In essence that's unrequited love as the central message that shin loo tries to potray in her story...Cis, I'm not very good with words
Okay, I joined and voted. It was no trouble at all, especially since I genuinely enjoyed the piece. I hope you don't mind, but I simply copied and pasted my comment from here.
oh you deleted your comment. anyway, to reply you, i truly mean that "And if you hate it you can tell me" statement. i really just wanna share my stories. criticisms are truly welcome. i said what i mean and i mean what i said. lolz.
8 comments:
I think that was nice story that at the end though it had the boys' attention, the flower's "riwayat hidup" came to it's end & spread new life as part of circle of life...Hahaha i guess you found your passion for story-writing......Keep up & all the best!!
This was very good. I loved the allegory of this story -- how it feels to love somebody who can never love you back. Someone who doesn't even know you exist. Making the subject of this unrequited love be a Dandelion was genius. Very nicely done, ShinLoo!
Some portions of your grammar could use tightening up, but overall the story was powerful, and your narrative voice lyrical. The emotional resonance of your prose stayed with me long after I finished reading the piece.
I clicked on the link, but for some reason I can't seem to post comments there. I'll keep trying and cast my vote for you.
robinson: thanks =)
david: thanks =) well u have to join the group then only can post comment. or have to email info@thecolorsmagazine.com to vote. but you don't have to go through the trouble. enough to know that you like my story. ;)
Hey i agree with David's review - In essence that's unrequited love as the central message that shin loo tries to potray in her story...Cis, I'm not very good with words
Okay, I joined and voted. It was no trouble at all, especially since I genuinely enjoyed the piece. I hope you don't mind, but I simply copied and pasted my comment from here.
Good luck! :)
of course not =)
thanks for your vote...
oh you deleted your comment. anyway, to reply you, i truly mean that "And if you hate it you can tell me" statement. i really just wanna share my stories. criticisms are truly welcome. i said what i mean and i mean what i said. lolz.
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